Someone asked me to write about the different tools and affordable resources that have helped me along my inner work journey, and I’m so happy they did because this is truly one of my favorite topics.
In a world that has normalized self-care as being bubble baths, massages, and long trips with friends, I am here to tell you that while those things can and should be part of self-care, there’s a lot more to it.
Inner work - self-care - is about the acts of taking steps to better yourself from the inside-out. If you're new to this concept, you might be asking: “what does that look like?”
Well, for starters, everyone's healing journey looks completely different. Nonetheless, doing your inner work means giving yourself the care, love, and attention needed in all areas of your life. From speaking better to yourself, challenging your limited beliefs, to unlearning all the things that were never yours to carry, and more.
Many of us, myself included, weren't raised to understand these concepts, so it’s normal to feel a bit unsure about where to start. Hopefully, this post helps you.
Accountability and Honesty
If I had to list the most important components for inner work, it would have to be taking accountability and being honest with yourself. These were crucial for my journey. It's essentially how and why I started this blog. It’s still an area that I'm constantly working on, but for the most part, I have rarely been afraid of facing my own shit to grow. Once you acknowledge the importance of accountability and honesty, your journey of healing will feel more like a flowing river rather than a forceful storm, and you’ll be able to see yourself in a new light. Being able to confront yourself is next level empowerment.
Journaling and Writing
Writing is a tool that will help you get to know yourself on a deeper level. For me, writing has always been my outlet. Every word I’ve ever written ended up being a guide to help me make connections with my past and present. I know for a lot of women, journaling can feel intimidating because they think they have to write whole dissertations, and let me tell you - you don’t.
Journaling doesn’t have to be complex, matter of fact, it shouldn't be. If two sentences are all you have in you to write that day, then do that. If you have it in you to write three pages the next day, then do that too. As long as whatever you’re writing makes sense to you and is honest - journaling can be a profound tool to help you with your inner work.
By the way: If you want to (and are ready to) turn your journaling up a notch, my mentor, Cici.B, created some journals with prompts in them that will challenge you in all the best ways. They are my favorite affordable journals and have helped me tremendously. Click here to get them. Highly recommend!
Affirmations
Affirmations are specific statements that help you shape your thoughts that later influence how you feel about yourself. In the beginning of my healing journey, I struggled a lot with feeling worthy to love and be loved. During this time, Pinterest and Youtube were my best friends, and they still are. I enjoyed playing affirmations in the background and would even record myself reading affirmations so that I could play them later. There was something about listening to the growth in my voice that made me honor my journey more. It was powerful. Here are some of my favorites affirmations that have helped me:
I am worthy of love, respect, and compassion.
I honor my unique gifts, trusting that I am valuable just as I am.
I forgive myself for past mistakes, knowing they helped me grow.
I am gentle with myself, allowing space for healing and joy.
I choose to embrace my authentic self, without comparison.
My presence brings beauty, strength, and kindness into the world.
I celebrate my journey, recognizing my resilience and courage.
I nourish my body, mind, and spirit with love and gratitude.
I trust myself to make decisions that honor my well-being.
I am proud of the person I am becoming every day.
Get A Hobby
If I have to swear by anything that is needed during this journey - it is to get a hobby.
My mentor reminds women daily of the phrase “get a life.”
When I first heard her say it, I laughed because I genuinely thought a life is what I had - that was until I realized the life I had consisted of prioritizing everyone else over myself - basically, that was my hobby.
The phrase “get a life” is very simple, but when your ego is at play, you may take it as an attack…well, at least I did. Healing more and more of myself allowed me to realize she was indeed saying it out of love and was invested in helping us (women) win.
I started trying on different hobbies to find what would fit me, and to my surprise, it worked. Since then, I have things to look forward to that have nothing to do with anyone else, and no one can take that from me, which is the best part. There was a time when people would ask me, “What do you like? What are you into?” and I would have a really hard time answering that because I didn’t know. Now though? I know exactly what I like from what I don't like, and that alone has helped me feel confident and secure within myself.
Support System
Having a support system is beneficial along your journey. As humans, we are meant to exist within a community; it’s what keeps us thriving. Wanting to isolate yourself in the beginning is normal, and I’ll even say it’s needed for a little while, however, having someone to talk with is important for your emotional and mental wellness. When I began my healing journey, I couldn't afford therapy, so I followed social media accounts that made me feel seen and understood, and joined their communities. Of course, there are many social media communities that can become a slippery slope, so make sure you always use your discernment when seeking them out. Pro Tip: The best communities are the ones where the person leading it is not just telling you “what to do”, but shares openly and honestly about their journey - their wrong turns, their trials, the things they had to unlearn, etc.
I want to end this by reminding you that everyone's healing journey is different. What has worked for me might not work for you and that’s okay.
Take your time through it. Give yourself grace through it. Keep an open mind through it. Keep being willing to learn through it. Eventually, you will find your own way.
You got this!
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